50 ways to protect your testicles from the metrosexual purge


  1. American men watch football, not futbol. Keep watching the Steelers, the Chargers, and the Giants, and avoid watching European metrosexuals with short shorts kicking around a sissy ball.
  2. Avoid voting Democrat. Real men don’t need urban ‘community organizers’ to protect them.
  3. Buy more guns. Real men shoot invaders, rapists, thugs, terrorists, and those who attempt Marshall law.
  4. Skinny jeans and trendy hair cuts–to fit in at work, or to please the misses–are a sure way to turn your cojones into over-dried prunes.
  5. Go to Church! Wimps, progressives, ivory tower professors, and Hollywood pseudo-men play the agnostic, or the atheist. But, in finding Jesus, you will find a hard working carpenter, and the Savior of genuine humanity.
  6. Drive a truck…or drive a car with balls. Real men who, by the way, aren’t suckers for climate change, don’t drive cars slightly smaller than their refrigerators.
  7. Real men are dads. Dead beat dads are cowards.
  8. Real men believe in, cherish, protect, and evangelize the Sacrament of Matrimony, solely between a man and a woman.
  9. Real men don’t force women to have abortions. Real men plead with their woman to keep the baby, love the baby, and do anything, and everything, to support the baby for life.
  10. Real men don’t choose tofu over beef. Unless you have health reasons for being a Vegan, eat like a man, not like some tree hugging Euro-trash wimp. Eggs, and a small bit of beef, actually keep men’s testosterone at normal levels.
  11. Workout! Don’t be a lazy fat ass. And, please, don’t be a trendy yoga wussy!
  12. Real men don’t smoke dope. Have a beer, but don’t be a little boy and succumb to social pressure and  smoke your brain cells away.
  13. Real men aren’t Socialists. Real men are Capitalists. Socialists are momma’s boys, while Capitalists are willing to work for what they get.
  14. Real men respect the military, and if they don’t actually serve our country, they at least pay respect to those that do.
  15. Real men are not politically correct. Truth, for them, is more important than popularity.
  16. Real men have borders with fences to protect real families, real property, and really beloved rights.
  17. Real men don’t compromise with Iranians.
  18. Real men kill terrorists and ask questions later.
  19. Real men tend toward solidarity with good people, while either keeping their distance from, or defending themselves from bad ones.
  20. Real men respect, cherish, and protect the Constitutional rights of the United States of America.
  21. Real men aren’t relativists.
  22. Real men don’t ‘evolve.’ We know what is right and wrong, and that doesn’t change!
  23. Real men will never be micro-chipped, have their guns confiscated, surrender to Radical Islam, allow Mexican thugs to run rampant in their streets, or have a Democrat destroy our nation without one hell of a fight.
  24. Real men read Sacred Scripture.
  25. Real men pray to God Almighty…and not Allah, but the Most Holy Trinity.
  26. Real men repent of their sins…and work as hard as possible, with the grace of God, to change for the better.
  27. Real men abhor Radical Islam.
  28. Real men still call God ‘Father.’
  29. Real men don’t pollute, treat animals with care, but don’t hug trees.
  30. Real men see value in fossil fuels, while remaining skeptical about a lot of the green energy crap being shoved down our throats.
  31. Real Catholic men seek for a Bishop who is more a Shepherd, and less a CEO.
  32. Real men are sheep dogs. Sheep, yes, for the Shepherd Jesus. But sheep dogs for the everyday wolves who seek to harm our beloved.
  33. Real men aren’t slaves to trends. Real men have real friends who warn them of silly trendiness.
  34. Real men despise entitlements, socialized medicine, and big government.
  35. Real men see the danger in ‘Sanctuary Cities.’
  36. Real men say ‘Merry Christmas.’
  37. Real men belong to the NRA, or, at least, have no ill will toward those of us who appreciate the 2nd Amendment.
  38. Real men don’t spend their whole lives in the urban metrosexual world of the elites, and the prissy progressives, but get out in the real world with real people experiencing real life.
  39. Real men don’t appease radical feminists.
  40. Real men are enamored with real women…
  41. Real men don’t watch network news.
  42. Real men don’t spend all day staring at their I-Phones.
  43. Real men don’t vote for Hillary or Bernie.
  44. Real Catholic men pray that Pope Francis isn’t a liberal.
  45. Real Catholic men pray for the Pope nonetheless.
  46. Real men don’t fall prey to the ‘cult of personality.’
  47. Real men don’t spend much time in the popular world.
  48. Real men use gangbangers for speed bumps.
  49. Real men aren’t afraid to offend in order to express the Truth, however imperfect they are in doing so.
  50. Real men don’t always win, but they never quit.

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